Being a single mom can be taxing and overwhelming. You have to go through various emotions, self-doubt, and anxiety in your day-to-day lives. If you’re a lonely single mother without a strong support system then you might be conscious and concerned about your child’s future or be confused about how to manage finances single-handedly and run a home. As a single mom, it is normal to find yourself feeling isolated and neglected by others which can take a toll on your physical and emotional well-being. This makes surviving as a solo mom with children more difficult. However, you should not give up and fight against all odds to provide a better life for your children. This guide will help you to learn how to be happy alone as a single mom and fight against loneliness and other mental health problems.
Challenges Of Being A Single Mom
Following are the list of challenges that single moms have to go through that can make their life difficult.
1. Have No Support System To Rely On
One of the main issues which a lot of single moms face is not having a strong support system or partner whom they can count on when it comes to raising their children single-handedly. No one is perfect and you need to realize that it is normal to make mistakes or make poor parental decisions. Having no one to tag in may make you feel isolated and result in a parent tantrum. Being overwhelmed with certain situations related to your children will make you feel anxious and depressed. You need to breathe deeply in and out and relax your mind. As per experts practicing deep relaxation techniques, exercising, deep breathing, yoga, and meditation will help you to focus and clear your mind. Research your mind and mood by listening to soothing music to handle the situation better.
2. Self Doubt
Being a single mom can be difficult as you are not aware whether you’re performing a good parenting job or not. Having a co-parent or partner makes life easier as you have someone to talk to about whether your parenting methods are wrong or right, and get their suggestions. Two-parent households or married couples are someone who can see the good in their positive parenting moments and can help them in making improvements if they fall short. However, this is not the case with single mothers who have to make all parental decisions on their own and this is not an easy feat. You may have to go through a lot of self-doubts about whether you are making good decisions on behalf of your children. This may affect your confidence, mood and also affect the relationship between you and your child. Single mothers are advised to avoid stressing about a perfect parent or perfect mother notion. Pay attention to your child’s behavior as well as character development. Surround yourself with other single mothers and supportive people who can guide you.
3. Feeling Anxious And Stressed About Money
It is overwhelming for solo moms to manage the household and parental obligations on a single source of income. Financial stress can take a toll on their emotional well-being. This is tougher if they have no one to talk to related to their problems and the burden gets heavier with each passing day. You need to write a budget every month and stick to it and cut unnecessary expenses. This will help you to lower a lot of anxiety and stress and handle your finances in a better way. The United States is one of the countries where solo mothers have to struggle while managing the family finances. Using expense tracker mobile labs and budget planner will help you in streamlining your monthly finances.
4. Losing Self Identity
Single mothers are indeed superwomen who have spent their whole time at a full-time job and fulfill their parental and household obligations at the same time. It is normal to forget about certain needs and place your children’s needs before you. However, you need not forget that you are a woman before you become a mom. It is important to take care of yourself and get out of the house on weekends and enjoy spending some time with your friends, families, and children outside. Reconnecting with others will allow you to vent your frustration and get confidence. Spend some time with yourself by writing a journal, painting, writing poetry, walking, performing a hobby that you love, and so on. This way you will not lose your sense of self.
How To Be Happy When You Are A Single Mom?
Following are a few tips to cope with the stress of being isolated and learn how to be a happy single mom.
Single moms should not forget to take care of themselves. They can better take care of their health by eating healthy diets, exercising, getting proper rest and sleep, and spending time with themself. You can raise your child and take good care of your children when you are in good emotional and physical health. Single mothers do not have a partner or co-parent to defend therefore they might not take care of their children when their health takes a bad turn. Therefore prioritizing your emotional and physical health is important to be a happy single mom.
2. Set Your Priorities
Single moms should define their priorities when it comes to raising children single-handedly. Your work, house confidential stability, and health play vital roles in single parenting jobs, therefore you need to prioritize these factors every day. Managing parental obligations and work can be overwhelming however setting your priorities will help you to manage them in a better way. Managing your priorities will make you mentally strong and will cause less stress and anxiety. Being a happier and stress-free parent will pass your positivity and happiness to your children.
3. Do Not Seek Perfection
Society has set certain standards based on limiting beliefs which they conveniently amend and alter from time to time. Perfection is a myth in parenting. It is normal to make mistakes in parenting and to learn from the mistakes. Single moms need to remind themselves that there isn’t anything about perfect parenting. All that single moms need to thrive for is happy parenting and in this way, they can take better care of themselves and their children’s well-being. If your kids are happy then you are imperfectly a perfect mom.
4. Cultivate New Friendships
Single moms are likely to suffer from loneliness, depression, anxiety, and other health problems as they do not have a strong support system to talk to about their ups and downs in life. Cultivating and nourishing new friendships will help in curbing loneliness and isolation from life. There are a lot of support groups and online communities and even social media platforms through which you can make new friendships irrespective of your age. You can also join a Bible study or club and build a community. This will provide you an opportunity to meet with other single moms who are navigating similar struggles to you.
5. Pursue Your Favorite Passions Or Hobby
It is tough to find free time as a single mom who generally does not get a moment’s rest and has to juggle things. However, carving out some time for pursuing your favorite interests and hobbies will provide you with a deep sense of satisfaction and will also make you mentally happy. You get an opportunity to connect to people and new groups who share similar interests and passions. Also, avoid spending much time on social media which can distract you momentarily from isolation but will not eliminate it permanently. Seeing life celebrations and vacation pictures of others may make you feel left out and lonely therefore try reducing the time you spend on social media.
6. Trust Yourself
As a single parent, you might get suggestions and advice from others on how to raise your child and whether you are making good parental decisions or not. This may be stressful at times. Although it is okay to listen to others’ thoughts and hear their advice, it is necessary to avoid making second guesses about yourself. You are the only person who can better manage your situation and take better care of your children. You must be aware of the accomplishments that you are making as a solo mom. Therefore you deserve recognition for handling the situation and all the life struggles on your own. Do not forget to congratulate yourself on your small achievements and avoid surrounding yourself with negative people.
7. Get Out Of Your House
Single moms need to get out of the house even though it is difficult for them to find free time. Take a yoga class, go for a run, grab a drink, go to dinner, get a pedicure, or browse a bookstore to feel better. The schedule doesn’t allow a single mom to be free, however, your motto should be to find possibilities during tough times. It is easy to accomplish a lot of tasks and get rid of feelings of overwhelm and depression if you’re organized. Keep a master calendar, make a list, establish plans, and evaluate your priorities and goals. Getting out of the house will help you to build relationships with others and find new companionship.
Can A Single Mom Raise A Happy Child?
It takes a village to raise a child and this situation is more difficult for solo mothers who have to manage everything and make sure that the children are growing in a healthy and safe environment. Things are pretty different in single-parent households however single moms need to prioritize the well-being and mental health of themselves and their children. For solo moms, the initial setup with children is the most essential part. Your wedding might not have worked out for several reasons however being a mother you need to have a positive attitude to raise a happy child. You have to develop healthy boundaries with others around you and develop cordial relationship rules. It is normal to occasionally go into self-doubt and self-guilt as you feel lonely with little support. This will affect your decision-making ability and lower your self-esteem. To fight against these struggles you need to develop a strong coping mechanism and have a rock-solid support system so that you can raise a happy child. Children of separation or divorce require a sensitive caregiving environment. Single parenting arrangements usually are a result of separation or divorce. If this is the case with you then you need to talk openly to your child about the changes that they are facing. Being honest with your kids will help you to form a good bond with them. Listen to their feelings and emotions and avoid making unnecessary details or negativity about another parent. Staying positive and installing a positive mindset in your kids will also nurture your relationship.
Single motherhood can be challenging and bring out self-doubt and fear however managing these emotions and acknowledging your present situation is important. You need to create a budget and prioritize finances that will make sure you are properly managing your finances. Time management is the key to spending quality time with your children, reducing stress, and completing tasks on time. Embrace the future and celebrate personal achievements to be happy in life. The journey of a single mom can be difficult and lonely with all the struggles and pressure of managing a family and jobs simultaneously. Following the above-mentioned tips and strategies will help you to embrace happy single motherhood and overcome all the obstacles in life.